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Newsflash: Natty Light Tastes Terrible

According to a recent study by RateBeer.com, Natural Ice and Natural Light are among the three worst beers in the entire world.

This may come as a shock (or not) to the many of us who see these beers on campus filling garbage cans, edges of the sidewalks, and in your right hand as you read this.

The study was done by thousands of beer enthusiasts around the globe. And no, you can’t convince your advisor that you want to minor in “beer enthusiasm”.

Last night, the main reactions to this news appeared to be shouting gibberish, vomiting, and falling asleep on College Avenue. For those of you sober enough this morning to read the article, do you agree with RateBeer.com and their attack on the sanctity of State College’s beer community?

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About the Author

John Dempsey

John is a Junior majoring in Journalism from Hazleton, PA. He is so awesome that sharks dedicate a week to him.
Likes: Video games, vigilante justice, irony, talking bears, Burt Reynolds, El Chupacabra, coloring books, chainsaws, and Australians.
Dislikes: Zombies, clowns, zombie clowns, turtleneck sweaters, Apple, poor mustache grooming, nuclear winter, Roman architecture, guacamole, robots, LCD TVs, the color yellow, Velcro, ceiling fans, sprinklers, tornadoes, Belgians, squat thrusts, and romantic comedies.

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The 3 Keys to Never Graduating

It is that time of year again. The weather is getting warmer when it feels like it and we switch to shorter pants just as the insects begin to multiply. It is a magical time of year that some of us will see for the last time in State College. For those lucky few, not going to class this week is a sign of maturity. With a college degree ensured, the world awaits you. Unless you’re in the Liberal Arts, of course. Then, your mother’s couch awaits you. However, there exist among us the ones that dare to take it to the next level. The ones that can’t get enough binge drinking, construction, and parking citations. The ones that will never graduate. How do they do it? Very, very smugly. These are the keys to never leaving Penn State.

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Penn State Alum Charged For Campus Vandalism

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