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Mount Nittany to be Clear Cut to Print More Collegians

Due to an emergency paper shortage in Centre County resulting from a rapid increase in Daily Collegian circulation, Mount Nittany will be clear cut so that students can continue reading the treasured newspaper.

“We just can’t keep up with the demand,” said a representative from the Lewistown Sentinel where the Daily Collegian is printed. “More students are reading the Daily Collegian than ever before. Every time you walk on campus, students don’t have their cell phones or tablets out — they’re reading the newspaper. We simply don’t have enough paper to keep up with it!”

The trees from Mount Nittany will be turned into paper so that the award-winning newspaper can continue its tradition of excellence.

“Everyone knows that print journalism is alive and well,” said a representative from the Mt. Nittany Conservancy. “It was the least we could do to help out since the Collegian always gives Mounting Nittany wonderful coverage.”

The Daily Collegian Editor-in-Chief, Boone the dog, was just excited that his newspaper would be able to publish again, despite the incredible history of the mountain.

“Woof, arf, arf, arf! arf, arf, arf, growlll,” said Boone (dog-dog), “Bark, bark, Clery Act, woof woof, growlllll.””

About the Author

Kevin Horne

Kevin Horne was the editor of Onward State from 2012-2014 and currently holds the position of Managing Editor Emeritus, which is a fake title he made up. He graduated from Penn State with degrees journalism and political science in 2014 and is currently seeking his J.D. at the Penn State Dickinson School of Law. A third generation Penn Stater from Williamsport, Pa., Kevin is also the president of the graduate student government. Email: [email protected]

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Staff Picks: Grabbing A Drink With A Prominent Penn Stater

If you had the chance to hear about Penn State from (or throw down at a State College bar for a night with) some of its most prominent figures, who would you want to grab a beer with?

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