Just kidding.
Famed OS commenter Laura Strobl is stepping out from the Facebook page and joining the Onward State staff.
It has just been announced that Canyon Pizza will be raising its slices to $1.50, effective April 2nd.
According to several eyewitnesses, The Willard Preacher suddenly said, “You know what? Fuck this. Seriously, fuck this,” and promptly became an Atheist today.
The Daily Collegian's sex columnists Dick and Jane are newly born-again virgins. They have stopped writing their sex column to pursue a new topic: Abstinence. They will now write for Onward State every Thursday about not having sex and why it's awesome.
After several years of arguing that the Neil Diamond hit "Sweet Caroline" should be played in Beaver Stadium, PS4RS has switched its stance, and is now opposed to the song being played anywhere within a 60 mile radius of State College.