Things Less Red Than Pat Chambers’ Face When He Yells
Penn State men’s basketball head coach Pat Chambers certainly doesn’t hold anything back when he gets fired up on the sidelines. While it may be unfair to call the coach hot-headed, one look at Chambers yelling at his group is enough to make you double-take because you thought you actually just saw Disney’s caricature of Anger from Inside Out instead. Seriously, his face gets RED.
To distract us from yet another season that started with so much potential and is ending with inevitable mediocrity, here are some things that are less red than Pat Chambers’ face when he’s steaming.
Your gambling earnings if you took Penn State to cover
If you bet on Penn State to cover in its last two games of the season, I have some bad news for you. The Nittany Lions closed as four-point favorites when they hosted Michigan and two-and-a-half point underdogs as they travelled to Nebraska. They failed to cover in both games, so your earnings are probably now in the red (i.e. you lost money) if you’ve been betting on the blue and white. Fortunately for you, your gambling earnings are still less red than angry Pat Chambers’ face.
Brutus Buckeye’s shirt
Yes, even that nightmarish nut’s bright red shirt is less red than Pat Chambers’ face. Simply, the Buckeye’s red shirt is broken up by grey stripes. Pat Chambers’ beet-red face is not.
Clifford the Big, Red Dog
If there was a competition to find out which thing is the biggest AND the reddest, Pat Chambers’ face and Clifford the Big, Red Dog would tie for first. Sure, Clifford is bigger, but Pat Chambers’ face is redder. Thus, we will never have a clear winner in this completely hypothetical (and irrelevant) competition. Sad!
Rutgers’ Red Out
Remember Penn State’s trip to Piscataway, New Jersey on this cold and rainy Saturday in 2016? Well a lot of Rutgers fans don’t because they were just not present. Was this even supposed to be a Red Out? Probably not. Either way, it’s less red than our basketball coach’s face. Even in this game, Rutgers will never win.
Pat Chambers’ seat
Pat Chambers may feel his seat getting kind of warm. One might even say it’s hot. Possibly even red-hot after he watched an NCAA Tournament bid slip through his grasp this year. Regardless of the degree of hotness of Chambers’ seat at the moment, there’s no chance it’s redder than his face.