The Seven People You See At Every Org Party
It’s October, which means that socials for many of Penn State’s 1,000+ organizations are just kicking into full swing. Prime bonding time plus the fact there’s not an overabundance of work this far away from finals week spells a peak opportunity for org drinking.
Inevitably, the people you gather with in meetings every week change character when the Nattys are cracked open and “Trap Queen” booms. With that in mind, here are the seven people you see at every org party.
The Awkward Roommate: He lives with the org member hosting the party, and, with no better way to spend his Thursday night, stuck around the apartment. You’ll spot him taking advantage of the free beer, macking on the girls who haven’t yet made friends with other org members, and lurking in the corner taking Snapchats of the party with captions that read “it’s lit” and employ the fire emoji.
The Freshman Who Never Drank Before: A bit shy, she joined the org for a chance to make friends in his or her first semester on campus. Now, they’re at their first college party. A keg stand, three jello shots, and two shotgunned Nattys later, they’re finally experiencing what her roommate told her college is “really like.” They may wake up the next morning with her face in the toilet, or find themselves in Boalsburg at 4:00 a.m. after taking the wrong CATA (the Blue Loop is BL not B!), but they’ll never forget this night.
The Kid Fiending For A Hit Of Weed: The president axed the idea of any weed-specific group messages or gatherings, but he’s still trying to get his fix. By 1:00 a.m., he’s pretty drunk, and the only thing on his mind is trying to sneak a puff. He’ll ultimately find his way out to the balcony where he’ll acquaint himself with the Awkward Roommates who are also outside taking some tokes. Under the pretense of introducing himself, he’ll jump right into the joint circle. Don’t expect him to take just two puffs and pass, either.
The Kid Just There For The Beer: A close friend of The Kid Fiending For A Hit Of Weed, this resourceful fellow found the beer, and is eager to imbibe. He’ll organize the drinking games, and has an affinity towards shotgunning and slap-cup played with liquor. In the GroupMe prior to the party, you’re damn sure he was pushing having a party this weekend, but didn’t offer to host. He may not be the most dedicated to the org, but it has at least given him some great access to some “killer” parties.
The Kid Who Tries To Sleep At Your Place: They’ve had too much to drink, and they’re not going anywhere. After a raucous night of org bonding, most of the party’s gone home. The president’s still there, rounding up the freshman in an effort to plop them on one final White Loop so they can make it back to East safely. But they’re simply not leaving. They tried to earlier, but wound up walking into the wrong apartment downstairs. Now they’re back, and already half-asleep on the couch. They may wake up the next morning to strangers watching Sportscenter in the living room, but at least they made it to their 9:00 a.m. the next morning.
The Kid Who Puts On Sweet Caroline: It’s 1:30 a.m. and the party’s winding down. Everyone’s sufficiently wasted, and the feels are strong. You need one last jolt to end the night before your group makes its group trek down Beaver Ave. to grab some Canyon. This is when the Sweet Caroline kids comes through for the first time all night. Grabbing the aux cord, he puts on the the preferred Neil Diamond hit of Penn Staters. As the “Where it began, I can’t begin to knowing” blares, the shoulder-hug circle forms, Snapchat videos flow, and the party ends with an overly-rousing “We Are.”
The All-Out Org Member: It wasn’t a great idea, but she couldn’t help it and wore her favorite org tee-shirt to the party. Org socials are moments for members to get to know each other in a non-meeting setting, but she’s constantly eager to speak strictly about her other orgs and how they compare to her current one. At any moment, and during any song, she’ll bust a move from a previous line dance, or encourage the entire party to recite the dance the org created at last Wednesday’s meeting.
EDITORS NOTE: A previous version of this story unnecessarily singled out a specific org on campus for the debauchery. This was unnecessary and unfair, and we apologize for the oversight.