Onward Debates: Root for the Patriots

I understand that if you’re reading this, you probably hate the Patriots.  Me personally, I couldn’t be more excited (the Billy Cundiff miss a couple weeks ago is a top ten moment of my life.  I spent the rest of the night yelling “BILLY CUNDIFF IS A FOARTH QUARTAH FOOTBALL PLAYAH” until I passed out from dehydration at 9:00pm).  However, seeing as neither Pennsylvania team is playing on Sunday, here are a couple reasons why you should root for the New England Patriots over the New York Giants.

  1. Rich Ohrenberger – This former Penn State offensive lineman is the best pro athlete on Twitter.
  2. Nobody Believes In Them – The New England Patriots are, for the most part, a team of guys who were passed over by other teams.  Danny Woodhead was cut by the Jets.  Wes Welker was undrafted out of Texas Tech.  Both standout tight ends Aaron Hernandez and Rob Gronkowski (more on him later) were passed over in early rounds of the 2010 draft.  The defense has been such a new look that all season I’ve been asking Siri who some of these guys are.  And then, of course, there’s the greatest success story & embodiment of the American Dream of our generation, former Michigan backup quarterback and the 199th overall pick from the 2000 draft (the seventh quarterback selected), Tom Brady.
  3. Tiquan Underwood’s hairAlso, Tiquan Underwood’s Hair.
  4. Big men get the ball – Dan Connolly (6’4”, 315) returned a ball 71 yards against Green Bay last year while Vince Wilfork (6’2, 325) has two interceptions on the year.
  5. Belichick’s sweatshirt—I know Belichick’s demeanor is an acquired taste, but as Penn State students, you can’t look down on his sartorial savvy.  Belichick’s sweatshirt is reminiscent of the “just woke up, I’ll wear whatever’s easy” wardrobe which most Penn State students execute on their way to class every day.  You’re not so different, you and him.
  6. Everyone loves a good revenge story—The New York Giants ruined what could have been the greatest season in football history.  Regardless of how you felt about the Patriots in 2008, right now we’re watching Kill Bill and Tom Coughlin is Bill (I know that’s a confusing comparison because there are two prominent coaches on the Patriots whose actual name is “Bill” but I’m committed to the analogy and Victor Cruz is Gogo).
  7. The line opened Pats -3.5 – Take the points.
  8. Rob Gronkowski – I could go on about this man for hours.  Whether it’s weathering the lockout by partying poolside at his alma mater Arizona, weathering the bye week making friends on Twitter (Davis says we can’t link to it), dodging tennis balls hummed at him by his dad when he was 4, breaking single-season records for a tight end in the NFL, bastardizing the Spanish language at every possible turn, spiking several pounds of pressure out of the ball following every touchdown, or returning to the game from a leg injury from Bernard Pollard, the same (EXPLETIVE REDACTED) who sidelined Wes Welker and Tom Brady.   Rob Gronkowski is a folk hero where I’m from.
  9. Myra Kraft/Bob Kraft – It’s widely noted that Patriots’ owner Bob Kraft is one of the most powerful men in the NFL and was instrumental in bringing the lockout to a close, something he did while grieving the passing of his wife.  Myra Kraft was a beloved humanitarian, and the Patriots organization have dedicated this season to her memory (that’s what the MHK patches on the jerseys mean).  The players want to bring home a championship in her name.
  10. The Undesirable Manning/Manning offseason storyline – We already know that the storyline this offseason is going to be a brutal cycle of “Is Peyton staying or going?” “Is Peyton going to play again?” and “Where is Peyton headed next?”, a storyline that will only be exacerbated if his younger and dweebier-looking brother wins a second title.  SportsCenter is already painful enough to watch, Manning/Manning could tip it over the edge.

So, that’s it.  Also, I think it might help Penn State’s future recruiting if Bill O’Brien shows up at some high school kids’ house holding a Lombardi trophy, so there’s that.

NOTE: To read the Giants side of the debate, click HERE.

Dennis McNamara (@dennismcnamara) is senior Masshole studying International Relations and cheering for all things Boston.  Go Pats.

About the Author

Dennis McNamara

Dennis McNamara is a senior studying International Relations. The product of a long and muddy Irish lineage, Dennis blames that sour heritage and his Boston area upbringing for the flaws in his character. The only paid writer for Onward State, Dennis has never been described as a team player as he often thinks of himself as “the smartest guy in the room.” In addition to contributing to Onward State, Dennis is also Creative Director for Full Ammo Improv. Dennis isn’t sure when he’s kidding either.

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